Posted by: rivettingkatetaylor | August 31, 2009

It can be over so quick

A parent at our school was killed in a car accident on Friday – the son is in my daughter’s class and plays in my son’s soccer team.

Friday would have been an absolutely normal day for that family then everything has changed in an instant.

Thanks to the habits of my parents as I was growing up, my family says goodbye everytime we go somewhere.  Not a big dramatic farewell like we’re never going to see them again, but a kiss and a cuddle and “I love you”.

This applies particularly at strained times when “bugger off then” might have been the preferred remark. Imagine if that was the day your loved one didn’t come home and that was the last thing you said to them.

On second thoughts, don’t imagine it – just say the right goodbyes, or au revoir as the French do (which means see you later, not goodbye).

Thoughts also to the family of the man shot at Waikoau, north of Napier. It will be bringing back memories for the Snee family. Good on the family member of the alleged shooter for alerting the police to his whereabouts. The right thing to do.

Talk about the wrong thing to do. We had an issue with our babysitter taking the kids for a ride in her car early on Saturday night (not early enough that they shouldn’t have been in their jammies though).  We may have found out from the kids (I don’t know if it was going to be a secret) but we called on our way from dinner to another party reasonably close to home and there was no answer at home. Ten minutes later we tried again. Still no answer. So we shot home. No one home, doors wide open and lights on but no-one home. 

She wanted to show the kids the neon lights working in the car in the dark. Our problem was that she has only had her full license for a month or so. We didn’t go mental though – it wasn’t something we had discussed with her, but if we’d left money for tea we would have been completely happy with her taking them down to the fish and chip shop and back.

So, we had a discussion about the right thing to do. Making bad judgements. The move from being the cool babysitter who does cool things with the kids through to being the grownup and doing the right thing.

It’s the first time I’ve had to pull the grumpy parent routine.

I remember babysitting for someone whose worker was a friend of my boyfriends. They called into the house at about 10pm to say hi and I chatted for a wee while out on the front door step before I told them they had to go. But I didn’t know the little girl had heard them. She told her parents in the morning – they told me it was unacceptable for people to call in (I agree) and I think the worker got a grilling. Actually the story stops there because I can’t remember if anything else happened!

Those were the days when you stayed the night for $10 and even helped with the housework the next morning because usually the parents had hangovers and needed a sleep in before we were taken home again.

And it is good to have a babysitter with a licence and a car. Nothing worse than getting home from a good night out and having to turn around and drive another 10-15 minutes.

Well, that better be my lot for the day. There’s work to be done.



  1. […] It can be over so quick at rivettingKate Taylor – sudden death and responsible babysitting. […]

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